She slices. She dices. She juliennes. She dons wigs and outfits designed to injure me, personally. She’s butch. She’s femme! She wears lipstick and a white T to a boxing ring, which is so gay that the scene itself is vegan and owns two rescue dogs. In every shot, she is someone I would let dump me upwards of six times before I finally blocked her number but kept following her Instagram “just for the cat pictures.” Except Kristen Stewart isn’t a cat person, she’s a motorcycle person, and I am first in line to get run over.Kate Leth for Playboy
Read all of Kristen Stewart Has Arrived here.